Someone asked me recently why I go through the trouble to do so many posts about zombies. I told them, “If I can save at least one person’s life when the unholy horde of undead rise from their cold end and start eating the flesh of their living brethren, it will all be worth it.”
The reason some folks have to be reminded of the importance of readiness is that most of them don’t recognize the inherent danger of the slow-moving zombie. Often times you’ll run across mocking laughter. And, lets face the facts: the shambling gait of the newly risen dead isn’t something that strikes fear in the heart the way a bounding leopard will.
But, the slow, weak movements of the average zombie are, arguably, the zombie’s greatest weapons. Their movements have a tendency to disarm their opponents, making them more likely to make a mistake. Imagine the Tortoise and the Hare.
Here are things to keep in mind that will keep you from letting your guard down around zombies.
- Zombies move slowly because they’re dead (See Zombie Locomotion for details) – but they also eat the flesh of the living because they’re dead.
- Zombies feel no pain – The reason this is important is: given the proper impetus (e.g. human flesh) a zombie can be persuaded to move its limbs quickly in short bursts of speed, in spite of the physical damage it does to their weakened bodies.
- Zombies tend to travel in large groups – Zombie experts still aren’t sure why (whether it’s out of kinship, or greed) but zombies are pack creatures. One zombie may not seem frightening by itself, but you’re more likely to encounter ten zombies than one; and in that situation, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and to make mistakes.
- Zombies are tireless – Outrunning a zombie proves nothing in the long run, because a zombie doesn’t stop for rest. On a long enough time line the zombie, much like the slow, ambling tortoise, will catch it’s prey. With one major difference: the jovial tortoise wouldn’t use its dull, crooked teeth to tear bits and pieces out of his friend, the hare.
- Zombies don’t know their limits – Something to keep in mind is that a zombie’s only motivation is to eat you, and it is a STRONG motivation. The zombie doesn’t know the science behind its body and it will do anything to get what it wants.
As you can see, the true danger of zombies is their ability to make their living counter-parts think that they are anything but a dangerous and well-equipped foe. Don’t let the zombie throw you off guard. Treat the zombie menace the same way you would treat any other creature that threatens your life, with extreme care and caution without making any assumptions.
And please stop mocking zombies. A bad attitude now will only translate into sloppy habits when the impending attack of the zombies happens later.
